“Grandparents, like heroes, are as necessary to a child’s growth as vitamins.” (Quoted in the judgment below)

One of the greatest tragedies of family fall-outs will always be the effect they have on the children involved. A recent High Court fight over a granny’s attempts to have contact with her two grandchildren in the face of bitter opposition from their father confirms that what really counts is what’s best for the grandchildren.

A tragic death, and a family fight

Two boys, aged 9 and 13, are the innocent subjects of this legal wrangle. They live with their father in Makhanda.

Their mother, a professional nurse serving in the SANDF with the rank of captain, tragically died in a motor accident three years ago.

Their father, currently a High Court advocate, had met their mother while a member of the SANDF’s Special Forces Unit. They were never formally married but the two children were born of their union. He is described as a good father providing his boys with good care and a stable home and family life.

Their grandmother is widowed and a retired nurse and midwife. Her requests to the father for contact with her grandchildren were met with an obstinate refusal to even engage with her. His intense dislike for her – based, he said, on his late partner’s anger issues with her –  was reiterated in his stance in the Children’s Court where he made it clear that he refused ever to talk to her.

The grandmother lives in the village of Herschel on a large plot, is in good physical and mental health, and says she is well able to look after for the children while in her care.

The Children’s Court, having received the reports and evidence of social workers (which spoke of a healthy relationship between mother and grandmother in contradiction to the father’s perception), granted access to the grandmother.  

The father appealed this order to the High Court. While accepting that the father genuinely believed that he was acting in his children’s best interests, the higher court upheld the contact order, albeit in a more structured form than the original. The grandmother now has access by way of:

• Weekly telephonic/multimedia contact
• Monthly day visits with her in Makhanda
• Mid-year and year-end school holiday visits to her home in Herschel, for a week at a time, initially under the supervision of the Department of Social Development

The decisive consideration

The Children’s Act sets out in detail a wide variety of factors to be considered by a court in deciding any application for access (referred to as “contact” in the Act). But as the Court here pointed out, the decisive consideration is always going to be the best interests of the child.

Every case will be unique, but one highly relevant factor that our courts will have regard to is “the need for the child to remain in the care of the parent, family, and extended family and to maintain the connection with his family, extended family, culture and tradition”.

Let’s close with this particularly apt observation from the Court (emphasis supplied): “Usually, it is in the best interests of a child to maintain a close relationship with his grandparents”.

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